Last week I was in the dark. I spoke about having to be in the dark to see the light. It is true. I do believe that sometimes God allows us to experience dark so we CAN see the light. Sometimes the dark lasts a long time. Sometimes just a short time. Sometimes are darker than others.
I had an eventful week, I spent the week saying goodbye to my mother. While she is physically here on the earth, I decided I finally need to come to terms with the fact that the mother who raised me, who was kind, loving and compassionate is actually already gone. Now, all that remains is a shell of anger and hatred. I’m sure I have some ownership in that, but most of it is based on lies that she believes. And, because of that, there is nothing I can do now except grief the loss of my mother and go on. Any attempts I have made to restore our relationship have been twisted by the alcohol, her boyfriend, and who knows what else to only end up hurting my mother further and I will not participate in that anymore. So, as someone does when they have a death, I’ve begun looking at my life without her. And, I’m ok. Life does go on and praise God for that!
I also heard from my precious teenager whom we’ve been ministering to and she is doing alright.
My husband’s department had a huge budge crisis this week and laid off 25 employees and 97 others were reduced to 32 hour work weeks. My husband was in the 97. So, we took a 20% pay cut among other benefits being taken away. I’m very thankful that he has a job still. We’ve tightened our already tightened belt and he’s looking for yet another extra job to make up the difference. My husband is an incredibly hard worker, and I have no fear that we’ll be fine. But, the cable was shut off immediately and the spending was stopped immediately. I’m working on cutting the grocery budget down further. God is good and we’ll be fine.
We got some good news regarding the adoptions this week. I can’t share details, but let’s just say it is GOOD….
And, we were asked to be Godparents this week! It was a huge honor to be asked and we’re thrilled!
So, it’s been a rollercoaster of a week. Which got me thinking. How would I handle all of these situations without God? It is really our faith that keeps us going. Without that we’d be really in the tank right about now, probably feeling sorry for ourselves!
So, this week I am so thankful for God’s provision in our lives and His constant working in our life. I’m thankful for the security I find in God, that He’ll never leave me, that people just can’t give me.
What are you thankful for?
This post is linked to Heavenly Homemaker for GratiTuesday.
This morning as I was praying about global things: Japan, Afghanistan, all of the destruction that is going on all over the world and then "funneled" down to my little world: my friends, my family, etc. I found myself amazed at how much God cares for us from the giant, global things to the minutiae of our everyday lives and how I can't imagine living any of it without Him. And how could anyone else! Which God used to convict me - what am I doing to help others learn about Christ so that they don't have to live this roller coaster without Him.
ReplyDeleteI'm so happy that He has brought you out of the darkness and so happy that as painful as it has been, it was relatively short. God is merciful.
I've seen how far you've come - with God's help. You have a lot to be proud of. I know I'M proud of you and proud to call you my friend. You are an inspiration!
ReplyDeleteAnd as for me - today, I'm thankful for a new friend who is helping me to really see me. (If that makes sense!)