Saturday, October 11, 2008

Jesus Loves the Little Children



We\'ve been in the process of considering foster care lately.  It\'s really kind of come along gradually.  First some history behind this whole idea: 

I\'ve wanted more children since our niece was killed in a car accident in 2000.  Her loss left an empty space in my heart that just can\'t be filled.  You never get over burying a child.  EVER.  Her death had the opposite effect on Michael, he didn\'t want any more children because the more you have the more chance something bad will happen to them...  I understand, but still, it left me feeling like I was missing something.

So, I teach young children.  I taught young 2s for 5 years, then 3s for a year and now I teach preschool.  But still....

Last year my cousin\'s children were taken away from her because she was doing drugs again, a decision that infuriated me, since a year prior to that her children\'s father died of a drug overdose.  Even without that I find it disgusting.  My Aunt took the kids and is caring for them while my cousin is in treatment.  I was in Utah and visited with them all and the Lord just really showed me something.  These precious babies didn\'t ask for this.  They don\'t deserve this.  What they deserve is to be loved for the blessings that they are.  That got me to thinking.  Here I am with this empty hole where there is all this love that just needs somewhere to go.

So, I started talking to Michael about and we started talking to friends about it.  We\'ve been in prayer about it and I feel this is where the Lord is leading us, but I want to be sure that it isn\'t me that\'s leading us in this direction.  In addition to what has been going on in my own family I have a very dear online friend who began doing foster care several months ago, and I\'ve had the privilege of watching that process, the ups and downs in her life.  So, I feel like I have kind of an idea of what I\'m getting into.

Well, in August we went to the informational meeting and I really didn\'t know what Michael was going to say after it.  I kind of knew most of what they told us, but Michael didn\'t.  Well, afterwards he felt pretty good about it and even said if we got a child that was high risk (parents rights likely to be severed) that we could consider adoption!

I\'m thrilled at the idea that we could have little ones in our house again soon!  We begin training on Friday, and as that approaches it becomes more real.  Part of me (the selfish part) wonders if I really WANT little ones again- do I miss changing diapers?  NO!  But then I really think about it and yes, it\'s worth it!

So, I\'m excited, but also nervous.  Can I give them back?  That\'s going to be the truly difficult part.  That\'s the part that calls on my faith.  That\'s the part that will grow my faith, and that is almost always painful!

What ever the Lord calls you to do He will equip you to do.

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